ABOUT GOOD MORNING EVILDOERS
Yes, we’re a podcast. But we’re so much more! There’s the massive, evil supercorporation. There’s a dog so adorable she’ll rot your teeth. And there’s an HR lady who puts the “sour” in “human resources.”
US, THE COMPANY
Global Synergy Amalgamated is a giant, multinational, multiphasal, intra- and extra-terrestrial organization with fingers in a lot of pies.
Well, not so much fingers. More like…enh…tentacles and various extrusions.
THE COMPANY has the obligatory volcano lair, a moon base, the more-or-less compulsory submarines and satellites, and a sub-sub-sub-sub-sub-sub-sub basement under an airport that is not Denver International. Nossir. There’s nothing actually going on under there. Honest. You can trust us.
Winifred Tofana: Head of HR
Winifred has been in the organization for as long as anyone can remember. In fact, when folks think too hard about how long she’s been around, they get a little headache and need to go have a lie down or find that they’re thinking about something else entirely.
Winifred appears to be a middle aged white woman, a little plump and less stylish than comfortable, who has a dish of only slightly poisonous candy on her desk. She wears glasses. She fusses over her small dog, Coelacanth. She owns a lot of cardigans.
Do not call her Winnie.
Stephanie Studer
There are some very cool Stephanie Studers out there. One is an editor for The Economist!
I’m…uh. I’m not her.
I’m a digital and content marketer. I like a dirty gin martini. And I’ve been known to get serious in the kitchen. But mostly, I write creepy stuff that (I hope) causes the occasional chuckle — this podcast being an example.
I’ve received ample and amazing help on this weird little project.
Brand Design and Visual Acumen: Julia Frank
Music and General Sonic Creepifying: Jakub Żerański
Site Construction: Marium Khan
Voice of the AI: Heather Amaral of Delicious Doom Chocolates
Additional Voices: Chris Irby, Rook Riley
But that’s the tip of the horrifying iceberg. Many, many thanks to:
Aaron Wheatcraft, Adrian Simmons, Aisha Willis, Allison Arnold, Alicia Coventree, Amy Sisson, Amy Tenbrink, Ben Fenwick, Beth A. May, Brooke Scarborough, Carissa Malmgren, Caroline Basile, Cass Morris, Charlyne H. McWilliams, Chris “Silver” Smith, Christopher Polito, Colby Horton, Dantzel Cherry, Dalila Ramos, Dona DeZube, Ellie Cary, Eric Zhou, Heather Guarino, Jacquelyn Dornbrook, Jake Weber, Jared Robertson, Janice Schange, Jill Hurt, Jo O’Brien, John Medellin, K.B. Wagers, Kallyn Hunter, Katie Kobilarcsik, Kim Perry, Kristen Boozer Larch, Laura Freeman, Lisa Smith, Lori Bonilla, Mark Finn, Michelle Muenzler, Paris Freeman, Patrice Sarath, Sanford Allen, Sean Freeman, Shai Fenwick, Shawn Deggans, Siobhan Cole, Sunny Polito, Susan Ruehling, Tex Thompson, Timothy Huneycutt, Tracy Sue Godsey, William Ledbetter, and Yvette Craig.
And I wouldn’t have even tried with my family: my brother Charles Studer, my sisters from other misters Heather Amaral and Rook Riley, my fella Chris Irby, and the inspiration for a solid 83% of Winifred and greatest mother in history, Ann Cruthird.
I love you all with what humans would call my “heart.”